Commitment issues? Here’s why + what to do about it.

I’m one of those people who overcommits to certain things and half-ass commits to others. The patterns are overcommitment to working and to other people’s needs/wants and finding excuses for erratic behaviors that could (if committed) improve myself in personal development, athletic goals, financial planning, career goals, and the like. I have become very committed to my health and wellbeing, a feat that has taken years, if not decades, by forming new habits that help me feel good. It’s time again to reevaluate and recommit.

In terms of food, I’m 100% committed to my values, and my food choices reflect these values 95% of the time. The 5% flexibility is for my own sanity and that of others around me, namely my children. Some may believe my food choices are too rigid – that’s okay! They’re my choices. Even with such conviction, I’m constantly improving how, what, when, where and how much I eat and drink to remain committed to feeling well in my mind-body (and it’s working).

Many of my clients, however, struggle to commit to food choices they know will benefit them mentally, physically and emotionally. I hear a range of underlying reasons for their lack of commitment. Most often: the feeling of restriction. Saying no to something that tastes good or makes us feel good in the moment (caffeine, alcohol, cookies) feels like we’re giving up something pleasurable. In reflection, I ask, “What are we gaining by saying yes to feeling well?” One common response is how a new commitment can be mentally taxing and provoke a range of emotions – anxiety, shame, guilt, judgment, FOMO – followed by physical frustrations – sweat, shallow breath, indigestion, IBS.

While we humans like to be in control of our choices, we’re constantly pressured by temptations of modern life and give in to choices that are detrimental. We are inundated by marketing efforts to sway our decisions – the constant scrolling through brands and influencers telling us what to do. It’s exhausting, confusing and may derail us from any commitment at all. And I’m not just talking about food, supplement and health choices – the temptations and coercion are endless.

Beneath the inability to commit to positive change due to common excuses of busyness, fear, comfort, confusion, lack of skills, etc. I see something I struggle with, too, in non-food related areas of my life: disbelief.

By “belief” I do not mean confidence in our ability to commit to say, working out three times each week or drinking half our body weight in water each day. I mean believing one choice will be more beneficial than our old ways of being. We must believe we’ll gain more by saying yes to something that will help us feel better versus saying no to some habit that prevents us from self-improvement. Good habits won’t stick if we are uncertain they will be advantageous.

To go deeper, we need evidence that these supposedly improved behaviors work, or we might not commit to even trying them. Deeper still, we must come to these beliefs on our own, through inquiry and introspection. If someone says, “Eat more leafy greens to feel better” (or to improve cholesterol, reduce inflammation, support cognition, etc.) we may not be particularly motivated to commit to eating leafy greens because we’re skeptical of their benefits for us, as individuals. Plus, fries taste better.

In the nutrition and wellness world, peer reviewed studies and other people’s success stories provide some evidence help us on the path to believing. We also need to see ourselves making the change, so visualization about our potential for improved quality of life can move the needle from thinking about change to acting on it (committing). Still, the biggest hurdle to commitment remains: believing we will gain more from a different choice. Otherwise, by default, we suffer from Einstein’s definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

Ever wonder why so many people want to sell their product, program or regimen to the masses? It worked for them – and they believe it will work for us, too! But it won’t work for us if we don’t believe it will and, especially, if we don’t commit to trying it. Once we commit to a new habit for a specific period of time – and with some flexibility to keep us present to the moment and life’s pleasures – can we evaluate how if we feel better o whether it worked. Often, we feel amazing, which is the evidence we need to keep going. 

People throughout history have evaluated commitment, belief systems and effective habit change. One key foundation to feeling better is to inquire about what we believe to be true for us? To do so, we must separate ourselves from what everyone else thinks and tap into our own intuition. In this era of over-stimulation, noise and information overload, it can be difficult to tune into ourselves.

Here's a commitment exercise for you (and for myself, too):

·      Name something you’d like to commit to fully in 2026.

·      Ask yourself why you haven’t committed already. Be honest. Release judgement and criticism about your reply.

·      Ask yourself whether your response is true and whether you believe it’s a legit obstacle.

·      Close your eyes. Ask yourself why you would like to commit to the action, behavior or challenge. Get crystal clear about your why. Be specific.

·      Visualize what your life might be like if you commit to the action, behavior or challenge.

·      Importantly, ask yourself how you might feel when you commit.

·      Tap into that feeling; give it words. Will you feel better than how you feel right now?

·      Ask whether you believe you’re someone who can commit to that thing. If not, there’s work to do on belief.

·      Either way, determine a first step to take to fully commit. Write it down or share it with someone.

·      Finally, set a date and time by when you will take the first step. Be clear – and make it soon, or your self-doubt may creep back in.

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I’d love to hear about your roadblocks to commitment, and I’m interested in knowing whether you complete this exercise about beliefs and commitment. Send me a direct message.

Originally written for my column, “Clean Food, Messy Life,” published by 5bGazette.com